I’m not Jewish but I too lost my tribe this year

As a son of migrant parents from Sicily, I was happy to have found my place in the politically progressive northern suburbs of Melbourne where I have lived all my life. When my electorate was named the most progressive in the country, I felt so proud to be a part of this tribe.

How could I not be proud? It seemed to be a vibrant and inclusive community made up of conscientious, educated Australians who love the environment, truth, fairness, and justice. It was the obvious group to align myself with to overcome the ‘brokenness’ I saw in the world. 

We saved the Preston Market from greedy developers, we grow gardens and live sustainably with our front yard composts, we share old baby clothes and ride bikes to the park. We voted for marriage equality, welcome refugees and campaigned for an Aboriginal and Torres Strait Voice Islander Voice to Parliament. We understood the science of Covid-19 and understand the threat of climate change. What a perfect team! 

However, post-October 7 I can’t help but feel that I have lost my tribe. The bigotry and vitriol I have seen directed towards Jews is beyond belief. This is not only seen through archaic antisemitic tropes once again openly spouted but to a new bigotry in the guise of ‘anti-Zionism’.

The fact that these views are not just apparent among the fringes of society or extremists but within political parties, institutions, and our mainstream society at large is devastating. I cannot begin to imagine the trauma this would ignite, both personal and intergenerational, in the Jewish community. It is not fair to have former allies and trusted platforms be so misguided.

Take the media as an example; Sky News and The Australian disturb me with 90% of their content but they align almost perfectly with my views on the issue of Hamas and Israel. Meanwhile, the ABC which I had believed was a bastion of intellectual rigour has become lazy, if not downright hateful, in their presentation of the very same news. I have been in freefall ever since as I find myself struggling to find my allies.

As I walk my dog through the streets I grew up on, I spend a lot of time ripping down stickers with ‘Zionism is Terrorism’, ‘FCK the IDF’ and ‘Intifada Now’ that adorn every second light pole. How can the same people that I once considered fair and reasonable perpetrate such hate? How can these people be so blinded by their one-sided version of the ‘truth’ that they have abandoned their values?

Nevertheless, when I leave the loneliness of those late-night walks with only my Staffy as company, wondering how terrible things are, I engage in conversation with my neighbours at the local park, the market or at kinder pick-up. I must say that I am pleasantly surprised that many of the people I talk to understand the conflict, realise it is complicated and are as disgusted as I am at those who misuse the term justice to instead spew hate towards Jews.

This has highlighted the increasingly evident phenomena of a society that feels they must align themselves wholeheartedly and unthinkingly to a tribe. Tribes that demand a binary view.

For the survival of a thriving liberal democracy, this cannot go unchallenged. It is imperative for all of us to leave the relative safety of our tribe and re-enter the world with the armour of our values and the protection of our mindset.

Instead of removing ourselves completely from the idea of compromise and hope, we should seek to be more knowledgeable and open and educate others to be the same. For example, when it comes to science and its attempts to rectify human subjectivity and susceptibility, we realise it does not always get things right. Yet, we understand that for us to realise progress and to celebrate ongoing success we must partake in more and better science.

This must be the same in education, journalism, politics and communication. We must be the change we want to see in the world and not add to the growing polarisation we are forced to endure.

Prominent cognitive neuroscientist, Dr Jonas Kaplan argues that belief is not separate to knowledge and as humans we are bugged with biases and emotions that distort and influence our ideas of truth. Beliefs frame every new piece of information that appears and without an appropriate sifting tool to help us overcome bias our truth will be flawed. Just like imperfect science requires better and more science, flawed beliefs require better and more education. As Kaplan surmises, forming a belief is easy, changing or disowning one is hard. This is because our beliefs and values are inseparably coupled with our individual and social identity.

Our beliefs, truth and identity influence us and help to build our mental models. These mental models are our navigational systems in the world and are impacted by biases that we must be aware of. One such bias is the Illusory Truth Effect. This is the inclination to believe false information to be correct after repeated exposure. Another bias is the Continued Influence Effect which is the tendency for misinformation to continue influencing people's thinking and decision-making even after it has been corrected or debunked.

One example coined by Sam Harris is the Fireplace Delusion. Everyone loves a fireplace, and many want one in their homes. It makes us feel connected to our ancestors, feel a natural heat and provides us with the entertainment of ‘natures television’. Harris presents the hard truth that although the sight of a glowing hearth in your home might feel comforting and natural it is the equivalent of a diesel engine idling in your living room. Unfortunately, feelings do not always match with what is good for us. Often in our lives, something might feel right but be fundamentally wrong.

What is your purpose of belief? Is it to be a loyal member of your tribe – a way to characterise your identity? Or is it to connect as strongly to reality as possible - a way to help remove bias, form consensus and help attain a better life for all going forward?

We may indeed need both, but we should not cling to a tribe or identity at the expense of moral clarity. We must form a transcendental mindset and decouple feelings from information. To be firm in values but open to change and aligned to truth.

It is safe to say that for all the destabilisation I have felt since October 7, I cannot help but feel lucky. Lucky because as a teacher at Bialik College I have found a community that has embraced me for who I am and more than that, embrace the values I hold dear. Thank you to the Bialik and wider Jewish community for sharing your stories of vulnerability but also strength and for making me proud of humanity and what we really can be. We can overcome this hate - we just need to be prepared to step forth with courage.