Why I didn’t circumcise my second son

As a practicing Jew, ARIEL KAGAN took circumcision for granted. As a medical ethicist, he couldn’t accept it.

At the moment of circumcision, most parents, have a panicky thought, “OMG, this is crazy!  Cutting the penis of an infant with a scalpel. Protect the child. You are the parent. Stop this now.”

I certainly had this feeling as our mohel (ritual circumciser) cut into the flesh of my elder son during his brit milah (Jewish circumcision ceremony).

Family and friends were gathered around. I wanted to be accepted by the community. I wanted to do the right thing. I wanted to honor my traditions. I was on autopilot.

Four years later, when our second son was born, I still felt guilty and conflicted over the experience with my first son. I still wondered if I had damaged him. I did not want to act on autopilot again.

I am trained as a psychiatrist and medical ethicist so, having had more time to think, I applied the framework of rational and moral analysis to the religious practice of circumcision before making a decision for my younger son.

Medical ethicists use three main moral principles to sort out whether a medical intervention is ethical:

Medical interventions must be in a person’s best interests and designed to genuinely help them (beneficence).

Medical interventions must not do anything to cause harm (non-maleficence).