When Rabbis Abuse: patterns of sexual abuse by Jewish leaders revealed in new book

ELANA SZTOKMAN conducted 84 interviews with survivors of sexual abuse by rabbis and other Jewish leaders. She uncovered disturbing patterns that cross national and denominational lines

For the most part, strategies of abuse are similar if not identical across faith cultures. The predator seeks out their victim’s vulnerabilities then works hard to gain trust, break down boundaries, weaken their prey, and control both the victim and the outside narratives through a host of serious mind games.

This is certainly the pattern across communities, cultures, and countries.

However, predators use the tools at their disposal, and in that sense, there are some distinctly Jewish language and cultural patterns, as well as societal expectations that Jewish abusers use.

For example, while grooming generally relies on victim vulnerabilities, rabbis often have privileged access to those—such as officiating during moments of loss, illness, or personal spiritual crisis.

Similarly, Jewish culture is often built around codes that identify “insiders,” whether that is Hebrew language, references to Bible or Jewish prayer, or even Jewish ideas such as “teshuva” (penance) or holiness.

One abuser used references to Buber’s I and Thou, another used Kabbalah, and another used the fight against antisemitism.

These are examples of cultural codes that create a sense of insider-intimacy in a uniquely Jewish way.

Prowling religious and communal events and virtual spaces such as social media
In many stories, victims were being watched at Jewish events, from camp oneg (Shabbat celebration) to synagogue kiddush to Jewish fundraisers to Jewish dating apps. It may be worthwhile to consider what counts as acceptable touching or boundary breaking at places like this, where people are so focused on socializing that predatory behaviours go unchecked.